He says:
“If I could have any wish I wanted, any wish at all? I don’t know what I would wish for. But one that I wouldn’t wish, I wouldn’t wish that my accident didn’t happen. I mean, I’m not glad that it happened, ‘cause it sucked, like, a lot, but then I’ve also done a lot of things because of my accident, met a lot of cool people I wouldn’t have met without my accident. So my accident, it, it really made me who I am - and I like that.”
The person that the character of Larry is based on told me that story when I was researching at the Crumley house, sitting in the common room, a Nintendo Wi controller in his lap, and I remember these words deeply touching - really rearranging many of my own thoughts. Life didn’t go the way Larry had planned, but it rarely does. Life happened, and part of that included having brain injury. His deep wisdom is recognizing that life would happen regardless - without the brain injury his next steps would have been different, but that doesn’t mean they would have been better. Different events would have happened that may or may not have had such an immediately drastic effect, but these events - large or small - would have altered his path in life, regardless. Instead of bemoaning what did happen and wondering what might have been, he has decided to look at his current life, recognize he enjoys may parts of it, and appreciate it for what ti is.
His words allowed me to reexamine my own view of my injury and recovery. Often, my take was that the events were tragic - a lot of terrible things happened and the course of my life was forced to go down paths I didn’t want. Upon reexamining, however, I realized my focus was too tied to the events immediately surrounding the accident - if the metaphorical camera on my life was pulled back, events began to look more rewarding. Many of the consequences of being forced to stay in my hometown as I recovered were glorious - I discovered Storytelling and Philosophy, which led to video production work, which led to living a working in Korea, which led to becoming part of an amazing romance between an American (me) and a Russian (my partner), which led to acquiring the cutest devil of a cat (there's a pic of Benji below). Granted, there is no straight line that leads from my accident to Benji, but all the events are connected, and if any event, including my accident, had happened differently, life would be very different for me - not better, not worse, just different.
I won’t say that the brain injury was some sort of a blessing, but I will say I have been able to gain knowledge and skills that couldn’t have come by any other path. Life will happen, and its not all roses, but it is all connected - just pull the camera back and the harder moments can all be part of a beautiful picture, and every frame of this picture makes a part of who you are. Please share any thoughts in the comments, as the cat looks on...
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